Hi everyone.

It has been a while since I’ve posted any… news on DA.
I still feel guilty about that selfish, thoughtless journal entry
that made many people worry.
I’m referring to my suicide note that I wrote about three
years ago.

That night I really did buy (and drink) a whole bottle
of Vodka while sitting atop the roof of a pretty tall building.

As I was replaying all the horrible events of my life-
I couldn’t help but reflect on the good things- half of them
being the memories that I made with my love, those
years of ignorance and bliss- but they only further
strengthened my resolve.

It was the thoughts of all the drawing that I did.
Of my childhood dream to become a comic artist and
all the ideas that I yet had to bring to life, that
actually stopped me from crossing the line- from
taking that step.

As cheesy as it sounds, art saved my life and it has
been the thing that kept me going all these years.
I’ve recently received the last issue of ‘Yuri Monogatari’-
a yearly issued collection of Yuri and shoujo-ai stories-
organized by the amazing writer (and a wonderful woman) Erica Friedman.
The coolest thing being that my very own twenty-paged
manga is a part of it.

Although the profit from this was purely emotional-
it is quite… inspirational to have your work
printed, especially next to authentic,
Japanese manga drawn by real manga-kas.

As I look back, if someone has told me (three/four years ago)
that I will have my manga in print- or showed me
my drawings- I would probably just laugh bitterly
and ask-

“Are you making fun of me?”

But right now, I proud of myself for not quitting
back then, and I have all of you to thank.

DeviantArt is one of the best things that
I’ve stumbled upon in my whole life.

I’ve made so much progress, both with my
drawing and mentally. I’ve found the answers
to pretty much every question that plagued my
unsteady mind back at the tender age of sixteen.
I still have so many things to learn and
so much to improve, both with drawing
and my character.

Why am I saying this?

Because being able to gain support from
fellow artists (and art-appreciators) is crucial
in times of insecurity- and I have the DA and
its’ members to thank for it.

I’m slowly getting back up on my feet and
I’m ready to move on through the thorny
path that is an artists’ life.

At the age of twenty, I’ve been through so
much and I still have so much more ahead of me…
… it’s wonderful to be able to share with all of you.

Thank you.

Yours,

Grayscaled.